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Reflection

There seems to be two types of people in the world. Those that embrace aging and those that deny its existence. Many people start to find out which category they fall into when a milestone birthday comes along. It can happen as early as turning thirty or maybe it is hitting the fifty year mark that makes a person cringe. As of this moment there is no way to stop the aging process…at least not accessible to human trial levels. 

In an era where “dirty thirty” was becoming all the rage, I myself turned thirty. I know I felt so pumped to be turning thirty, like this is going to be my decade! I was going to do all the things, learn as much as I could, improve myself in all ways. So here I am close to embarking on my thirty-fourth year reflecting on how things are going and have gone. I could say my life has followed a pretty normal time frame with hiccups that make it uniquely mine. My twenties entailed finding love, losing it, and finding it again. I brought a couple of boys into the world, graduated from college with a degree, started my career, and even got married. 

Turning thirty felt like a new era was beginning for me. I wasn’t going to just follow the status quo, that my possibilities were endless. Was it a mind shift? I feel like my focus expanded to a bigger place. I am no longer just laying around (well not as much anyways) binging on shows. I am no longer passing through life with a focus on everything else. Is this growing up or maturing? I do not know, but I know the feeling of amazement was strong that day. I made plans with my family, I bought myself a new outfit, and I wasn’t going to let anyone bring down my mood that day. 

Maybe the shift of leaving my Saturn return behind as well as it entering my first house has brought forth these feelings in me? I am researching more things that interest me. I started buying more things that I wanted to try (and still need to put more effort into trying). I am reading more books than just fiction. I am working on moving past my fears and being okay with being uncomfortable (part of the reason I am getting a slow start at this blog thing). This is the year that I want to continue to make great strides in myself and my journey of life.

I am starting this blog to work on my writing, to share things that I have done since turning thirty. It can be so easy to get caught up in trying and doing things, and not taking reflection in how it has affected me. I can miss how it is changing me, bettering me, or let thoughts of doubt cloud my vision. Upon the new year I wasn’t feeling like I accomplished much, but after reflection, I have realized that I truly did. It may not be to everyone’s standards or ideals, but it is still something that I can say I did. So hopefully others will read this and enjoy it, but if not I won’t get upset for I still have accomplished something I have only thought about doing before. 

So reader, have you noticed any shifts in your feelings or outlooks on life? Are you creating the life you want regardless of what people say, or think?

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